Last Class of Character Chess Session One

It’s official, IFAA Wednesday night sessions with the kids is a part of the Wohl Family.  You know when you are family when people start taking you for granted.  It’s like the kids just expect us to be there and that’s fine with me.  

Even though we planned to have a big end of the session celebration, the kids helped us understand that we are not going anywhere.  Our regulars strolled into the Renaissance room and awaited our inspiration.  Dominic made it clear to Zundra that she could control the sign-in sheet but he was in control of program.  He taught Zundra, Keith and other new comers how to play “The Pawn Touchdown Challenge” in preparation for the Snickers Candy Bar Tournament.  

We read stories from the Character Chess books and played several games last night until all the Snickers were gone.  Yet, what happened after the session ended convinces me that our involvement with Wohl is essential and must continue.  

It is common for the adults to linger around past our official end time of 6:30pm.  In that same fashion we talked until a gang of beautiful genius girls wondered in to enjoy the Renaissance room.  We read to them and affirmed their genius for a few minutes.  As we all were leaving the center, Mark and I stood outside sharing ideas of how to take over the world.  Surprisingly, two of the Character Chess participants approached us.  

“Can you give us a ride home?” says the older brother.  It’s 8:00pm, cold, rainy and very dark.   Shocked, we replied, “that’s not a good idea and its probably illegal.”   After pondering the legal ramifications and exploring the parental responsibilities, we decided to make the 3-block walk with the boys.  Along the way, the boys shared wonderful insights into their world of challenges.  In short, we were stunned both by their willingness to share and the deplorable conditions these kids have to endure.  (Side note: Not being from St. Louis, I think this might have been Mark’s first late night walk on the North Side. It’s an experience all the alums should have.)

Here’s the lesson for us.  We must continue to be available to the children of Wohl.  These kids have come to trust and respect us.  We have an awesome opportunity to expand their dreams, encourage efficacy and sometimes literally walk with them on their paths to greatness.  I feel honored to be a part of this journey.  As we plan for Session 2, I want to remind our fellow alums that you have a great opportunity to be inspired by these beautiful children by participating on Wednesday nights.  This is our community and we must continue to do our part.  Be a blessing and receive one.  

Passenger or Pilot?

“In the case of emergency or a change in cabin pressure…place the air mask on yourself before helping others.”

Anyone who has flown on a commercial aircraft has heard this standard advice from the airline staff while buckling up to take a flight. It is important to take care of yourself first in any emergency and then assist others as you can. These safety tips have found their place into our current philosophical discussions.

There is an emergency. Black America airlines flight 314 is experiencing major structural problems.Graduation rates have dropped below 50%. Murder rates have exceeded the causalities of the War in Iraq.Teen pregnancy, AIDS, and incarceration rates have breached the community hull and threaten the structural integrity of the family. These dire conditions are common among minority communities in the United States. The ship is going down and everyone is screaming, “What are we going to do?”

Too often the answer is, “save yourself.” Too many of us have adopted the advise of the stewardess and made self preservation our first priority. It’s the norm for blacks to use the resources of the black community to come up from poverty, save themselves and disappear into the wilderness of America society. This is to be expected of most of the passengers of any sinking ship or plane in trouble.

However, there is a higher responsibility for the ship’s staff and leadership. Their primary responsibility is for the safety of the crew. From the pilot to the stewardess, every staff member is responsible for the safety and well-being of the passengers. They are trained to handle emergency situations. They are prepared to be calm in the face of turbulence. And god forbid the plane experiences engine failure. They know how to safely land the plane.

Leadership challenges us to make saving others our first priority. Yes, things are failing apart in the Black community. The community appears to be separating at the seams. There are definitely signs of engine failure. And worst of all the community seems inadequately staff to handle this emergency. Yet, the truth is that we have been trained and equipped to handle this challenge. No situation has come upon us that we are not prepared to handle, survive and thrive. In the case of blacks, we have overcome slavery, Jim Crow, segregation and inferior educational systems to become the world’s leaders in sports, academics, economics, entertainment, politics and government. Surely, we are ready to meet the challenges of a little engine failure.

Black people are capable of saving black people. It will require that we commit ourselves to helping the people in our communities. It means helping your neighbor in need. We must open our eyes and answer the calls of our communities. Answering these calls requires money, time and commitment. Being a community member means being available and accessible to the people who need you. Like the staff of a first class flight, we are to be servants to our community.

The new question for us to answer is this: “Are you a passenger or a pilot on this flight?” Is your first concern you or the crew? As a leader do you have the faith to believe that the ship can be saved? Are you willing to ride the winds down to the last moments and beyond? Are you willing to risk your own life to save the lives of others? These are tough questions but the reality is, there is no bailing out for the captain. There is no parachute for the leader.

Efficacy-Day One

"Efficacy is the power to produce an effect-the capacity to mobilize available resources toward a desired end."

Question:

Why does anybody need to spend three days talking about one word?

Answer:

Because your "success" depends upon it.

I have always thought of myself as being pretty smart. Well, actually that's not true. There was a time when I was smart and then I was convinced that I wasn't smart and then I was called smart and then I believed I was smart but not really. So, I have been trying to prove that I am smart ever since; that is until Wednesday, November 17 2010. That is the day I met Barbara Logan of the Efficacy Institute, Inc..

Day One:

It is nearly impossible to reproduce the content that has been brilliantly shared in our first day with Mrs. Logan, a powerful presenter with the Efficacy Institute from Milwaukee, Wisconsin. It might also be illegal to do so. Instead, I would like to share three observations or insights that I have gain about myself and my fellows in our time together on Wednesday.

Awareness is light in a dark room. The basic concept behind Efficacy is the understanding that effective effort produces results. We all seem to get that. However, there is a deeper belief among many, if not most, of us that we have some kind of "Natural Super Power" within us that makes us more capable of achieving higher results, or out performing other people. When presented with the idea that we don't have this "innate" ability many of our classmates responded as if they had been told "You are not Superman." As you could, imagine that can be pretty disappointing. So, it has taken us a little time to get beyond not being super.

We have been conditioned by our condition. America has been waiting for Superman a long time. It's like we have been taught since our first day of school that there is a great person among us. None of us knows who that is but one of us has within them the seed of greatness. That one person will be our hero and will save the world. And with that thought, we start the egg hunt. We start on this race to find out rather we have "it" or not. We test ourselves and search our souls for signs of the "seed." Unfortunately, our teachers, friends, neighbors and sometimes parents reinforce this idea of "some have it" and "some don't."

The reality is that there is no Seed. There are many seeds and we all have them. A "Learning Orientation" helps us understand that we are good at what we develop. Conversely, the belief in the "Great Seed" theory or a "Performance Orientation" leads us to believe that there are only a few great people among us.

Love Mobilizes Me. At some point in the egg hunt, you will stop searching. The reason the "Great Seed" theory doesn't work is because most of us would be losers in that model. If there is only one egg is the game, then the game is over when I see you win. There is no reason for me to keep searching for something that not there. For example, I see myself as "The Strong, Smart, Creative, Person of Color" in my department. On Monday morning, a strong, smart, creative, person of color is promoted to a leadership position in my department. What do I do on Tuesday? It is very likely that I will become immobilized; unmotivated, non-responsive and disengaged because I'm confused about who I am and what my role is now.

A Learning Orientation reminds us that our love for a thing moves us forward. It is your distinct passion for a thing and your life's unique journey that makes you valuable to any organization. We develop skills and competencies through our journey, which is filled with successes and failures. With this orientation, we see every experience filled with data. Our successes and failures give us feedback on how to get better. They do not determine rather or not we are "the one." Most importantly, operating in our "zone" keeps us motivated to perform.

I am smart. Not because, I'm the brightest light in the room or because I scored well on that project last week. I'm smart because I am learning from every experience and I'm getting better. This journey through Efficacy has been a personal discovery process for me. What discoveries have you made about yourself?

It is Good to Be In Fellowship

There were two men of great wisdom gathered around a fire one winter evening. One man spoke of the many reasons why he needed not attend church anymore. “I’m very well versed in the teachings of the Bible.” “I don’t need anyone to interpret the Bible for me.” “I have so many other things to do.” He found his own place of communion with God. He went on and on with the many reasons why he did not need to go to church anymore. The other man sat quietly, poking gently at the fire. And as his friend concluded his list, he gently removed one burning coal from the fire and placed it to the side. The friends watched as the burning ember quickly faded into a cold, black rock. No other words were needed.

I first heard of the word “fellowship” in church. It was defined as “being among like-minded believers.” Initially, I thought it was a little ironic to find it here again among business professionals in a diversity initiative. Yet, after a little thought, I found the term quite befitting. People don’t go to church like they used to and this is partly because they are spending so much more time working or thinking about work. Our fellowship is meeting a social need for many busy professionals.

As an entrepreneur, I leverage relationships into profits. As a result, the years have misled me to seek financial or professional benefits in every interaction. For example, the alumni association recently formed with a mission of expanding our fellowship opportunities. My first response was “for what purpose?” The idea of gathering for the sake of gathering was a waste of time in my mind. Yet in reality, I probably need the fellowship more than anyone.

Relationships for the sake of relationships is an idea that I would like to continue to explore. I am fueled after every experience with my classmates. I feel alive and on fire after every event. While not a religious experience, it is definitely a spiritual one. To be among a diverse collection of fellows committed to understanding, developing and serving with their gifts is a blessing in itself. I look forward to every opportunity to share with my classmates in conversation and friendship.

It’s good to be reminded of the value of fellowship. Can you help me generate a list of 25 reasons why fellowshipping with fellows is a good idea?

Will The “Real Black Community” Please Stand Up?

I am confused. I was taught that you were supposed to give back to the community that supported you. I am a product of several communities; the black community is one of them. I attended all black schools until high school. I grew up in a variety of black communities all of my life. I attended a historically black college. Most of my mentors, teachers, and preachers were black. As I recall, most of my neighbors and friends were black people; all of which wove a colorful pattern of support for me and my family. At every turn, I had someone reminding me of my potential and my responsibility to develop my gifts to greatness. This collection of people prepared and propelled me forward into high school, college and graduate school. It is the strength of that community of people that lifted me above poverty and mediocrity. The success that I am experiencing right now is largely due to that group of people we refer to as the Black Community.

I recently talked to my 7th grade math teacher from East St. Louis, Mrs. Nave. Ironically, she is the reason I am a writer and speaker today. When I was young, I questioned everything. “Why is the sky blue? Why do birds fly south for the winter? How do they know which way is south?” This frustrated my family and most of my teachers, but not Mrs. Nave. She taught math and she had answers. As a result, I developed a love for math and she developed a name for me, “Attorney Hodge.” She saw potential in my inquisitive nature. I found value in it also. Today, I am paid well for asking questions and finding solutions. But here’s the problem: Where are they now? I’m not looking for the individuals but the community.

Most of my adult life I have lived in predominately black neighborhoods and my son has attended public schools. However, most of my son’s teachers are not black. We are very fortunate to have had wonderful teachers. However, I can’t help but wonder “where are all the black teachers?” Similarly, I have found a shortage of blacks in social organizations, black business associations, and political associations. One would think that St. Louis didn’t have very many blacks.

Where does one go to find a diverse representation of blacks in St. Louis? Where do we live, work, eat or play? Where’s the black part of town? Where can I find black art, cultural, restaurants, museums, music or plays? Where can I go to just find black people to talk to? Are these questions inappropriate to ask? Is it racist to suggest that there might be such a place? Nearly every other racial or ethnic group in St. Louis can answer these questions. Why is it so difficult for us?

The reality is that we have been divided into two camps. It began about 56 years ago with Brown vs The Board of Education Topeka, Kansas Supreme Court decision. The result of this decision dissolved race-based schools and communities. Gradually, black communities like The Ville in St. Louis City were abandoned by “well-to-do” blacks seeking better schools and communities among non-blacks. This left poor blacks to develop a sub-black cultural of its own. Consequently, what we have left is half of the former black community speckled into large white communities and the other half concentrated in abandoned black territories. Neither of these groups represents the whole. It is even more tragic that these two group rarely come in contact with eachother. Yet, we promote and continue to discuss the Black Community as if it actually exists.

Today, we are faced with this perplexing reality. There is no longer a real black community at all. It seems that we have given it up for integration. Is that what we intended to do? If so, where am I supposed to do my community service?

Defining Your Leadership Brand

“There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” Marianne Williamson

Lethia “Letal Weapon” Owens is everything she says she is. Without compromise, Mrs. Owens needs no permission to let her light shine. During this month’s session she lit a fire in all of us. For me, this was a wonderful ride of self-reflection and definition. From beginning to end, I was recording quotes, notes and action steps. Most of all, I finished the day with a renewed sense of permission to let my own light shine.

There is a fine line between humility and invisibility. Lethia said, “Talent is not enough..Talent Maximized equals Value Added Performance.” At times, it seems self-centered to self-promote. It is much easier to let others sing our praises and speak of our good works. Yet, we must realize that no one is more capable or qualified to promote us than us. I have recently begun to ask the question, “who should be your biggest fan?” After a little though, most people agree, that “I should be my biggest fan.” If that is so, we should be the best at defining our unique gift to the world. Time with Lethia gave us all an opportunity to explore and define our gifts. As a result, I believe that we will be more keenly focused on how we can serve our companies, organizations, communities and clients.

The following is a list of quotes and ideas I gleamed from Lethia Owens power packed presentation.

• “What makes you different, makes you valuable. What makes you valuable makes you wealthy.”
• “The perfect job for you is the one you create.”
• There is a lot of money in “free.”
• “People are more forgiving of your flaws when your gifts are apparent.”
• “I embrace the genius in being me.”
• “Collaboration is the fastest path to success. Isolation is the fastest path to insanity.

For me, self-promotion starts with recognizing and embracing my unique gifts. The next step is developing my gift. And the reason for it all is to be of service to my community. I encourage all of my classmates to take Lethia’s advise and guidance and spend sometime planning how you will use your “Signature Strengths” to service your community.

The Purpose

Disclaimer: I’m probably too excited about this new diversity initiative in St. Louis. The Initiative, in short, is a program designed for minority business professional in the St. Louis Region. One of the goals of the program is to bring aspiring corporate and non-profit professionals together to sharpen their tools for leadership in their respective organizations. As an entrepreneur, I have petitioned the director for years to participate in this program. I’m excited to say, “This is my year.” I was selected to participate in this year’s cohort.

Now, with that being said. I am too damned excited to be in this group of high powered, good looking, positive people. Every month, we get together and have the best presenters and speakers come and inspire us to be GREAT. That’s the purpose, to get together to get better. The director reminds us every session that “This is all about you!” There are a few of us that take these words literally and forget about the other people in the room. I’m personally okay with that.

But on the other hand, the point has been made that we all have different ears and eyes. Which means that we often hear and see things differently. Therefore, I thought it might be useful to share my reflection on our experiences. Being sensitive to the confidential nature of our discussion, I will never disclose any personal information about our session. In addition, any personal information that may be disclosed in comments or post will be discouraged and removed immediately. It is my hope to represent key learning and my personal reflections. My hope is that others will do the same.

Voices of Diversity is an opportunity to record our reflections for the sake of sharing a new prospective. Like the uniqueness of snowflake, each of us receives our message through our own filters. Those filters are designed by our life’s experiences, and emotional cultivation. As you listen to my voice, understand that it is but one person’s perspective in a world of infinite ways of hearing. To make this place true to its purpose and title your voice is essential. Please share your voice of diversity.